Crush it Cole
by daydreamlife
Summary: When Cole, a character from the arcade game 'Fix it Jay Junior', tires of being the villain, he'll go on an epic journey through game worlds. With the unexpected help of four other characters, he's out to prove that even if he's the 'bad guy', doesn't mean he's a bad guy. Wreck it Ralph AU! Full summary inside.
1. Trailer Prologue

Full summary: When Wu's Family Fun Center closes at night, the various video game characters leave their in-game roles and are free to travel to other games. One of these characters is Cole, the villain from Fix-It Jay Junior. Cole doesn't like being a 'bad guy' and dreams of becoming a hero. In a quest to prove himself as a good guy, he'll travel between games in the arcade and meet interesting new characters. With the help of two siblings from the first-person shooter Samurai's Duty, a young glitch from Sugar Rush, and the hero of the very game he despises being a part of, Cole must eliminate a dire threat that could affect the entire arcade. A threat that he may have inadvertently started. If it wasn't already obvious, Wreck it Ralph AU!

oOoOoOo

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

I know I should be working on 'Lights! Camera! Action! Ninja?', but this popped into my head for some reason. Probably because I watched Wreck it Ralph twice in three days and listened to When Can I See You Again at least twenty times. This isn't so much of a chapter as the trailer for the story, and DANG was this fun to write.

Technically this could be a Wreck it Ralph Ninjago crossover, but my computer refuses to let me click on 'Crossover' when submitting stories and it's more of an AU anyways. Well, I don't have anything else to say, so... Enjoy!

oOoOoOo

Closing time at Wu's Family Fun Center is a pretty lengthy process. The old man gently shoos the groaning kids out, washes the counter, picks up stray change, vacuums, inventories the snack stand and the cash register, dusts and fixes the machines, pulls down the blinds, locks the door, and finally heads home.

Then all is quiet. All is still.

Until whoever is at the screen at the time on Dance Dance Ninjago (the closest game to the door) calls out the "All clear!" That's when the arcade comes to life and the video game characters are free to do as they please.

I'm one of them. My name's Crush-It Cole from the game Fix-it Jay Junior and for thirty long years I've been breaking buildings, wrecking windows, and generally crushing everything in my path. Whenever Little Mister Fix-it gets to the top of the apartment building I'm taking down, I get thrown off and land in the mud.

Game after game, mud. Hour after hour, mud. Day after day, mud. Week after week, month after month, year after year, I fall off a building and land in the mud. And that HURTS like brick.

You know, it's hard to love your job when no one else seems to even slightly like you for doing it. As Gene (the mayor of the Nicelanders, who really aren't that nice) once so helpfully put, I'm just the bad guy who wrecks the building.

If I'm being honest with myself, it would be nice to be the good guy for once. I just don't want to be the bad guy anymore. Anyone I tell that to says that I can't change who I am.

Well, too bad. Even if I can't change who I am, I sure can try.

_COMING SOON..._

"Cole abandoned his game. How do you not see how serious that is?" Fix-it Jay Junior said desperately, staring up at the two red-clad figures.

"Like this." The male tapped a finger on his chin mock-thoughtfully. "Huh. That doesn't seem that serious."

The girl punched him in the side and he collapsed in a gasping heap. She smirked.

_FROM DAYDREAMLIFE PRODUCTIONS..._

"Welcome to Game Central Station," a cool, calculated voice echoed through the huge room. "Trains for all stations now boarding."

Cole bit into a big, juicy, bright red Pac Ninja cherry and kept walking, trying to ignore all the gasps that followed him and the characters who ran away.

"Everything changes now," he breathed.

_HE'S EXPLORING NEW WORLDS..._

"Once again, fear is a four letter word here, ladies. If you're too chicken to face a CySnake, you're no Samurai," a stately woman dressed in red and brown armor instructed as she distributed ono axes and quivers full of arrows.

Cole, clad his own dark metal, raised a hand. "What's a CySnake?"

"Shut up, Private Darreth, I'm not in the mood for your nonsense," the woman ordered, tossing a wicked looking kama-like scythe at him with enough force to knock him over.

"Where's the wrecking guy?" A bespectacled young blonde wondered as she gently poked at the screen.

_HE'S MEETING NEW FRIENDS..._

"Um, hi Mister," a small white-blonde girl Cole hadn't seen the moment before piped up. Cole yelped and slid down the tree.

"You're not from here, are you?"

Cole frowned. "Sugar Rush? I'm in Sugar Rush?"

"You're game jumping?" The old king asked in horror.

_HE'S GOT ONE CHANCE TO PLAY THE HERO..._

"Without Cole, we're doomed!"

"They're gonna pull our plug!"

"Aaaah!"

"What's that?" The girl asked eagerly.

"A metal. I won in Samurai's Duty."

"Duty? Or doody?"

"No, not doody! Nothing like that!"

"I- I guess you really gotta watch your step in a game called Samurai's 'Duty', right?"

_NOW_...

Cole sighed, curling up in his bed of bricks.

The samurai commander looked around fiercely, battle ready with a pair of long gleaming kaiken daggers. The second in command hefted a hachiwari sword in one hand and a katana in the other.

Racers in candy cars sped down the sugary road.

_HERE COMES A STORY FOR EVERYONE..._

"Everyone here says I'm just a mistake," the young girl admitted somberly.

"You ready for this?" Cole asked.

Jay stared up at them in awe.

_WHO EVER NEEDED A RESTART ON LIFE._

The trio zoomed down the tunnel on a hovercraft.

"I'm not leaving you here alone."

They shook on it.

The CySnakes reeled back and hissed.

Cole broke into the room Jay was stuck in and the small blue-suited man gasped.

The line of ghosts saluted.

Lasers sparked and fired.

"Let's close up with the bad guy affirmation. I am bad,"

Excited, Cole blew kisses to the crowd.

"and that's good."

Jay and his Nicelanders danced.

"I will never be good,"

Cole opened his mouth threateningly.

"and that's not bad."

Mystake inclined her head towards Cole and walked off.

"There's no one I would rather be then me."

_WITH THE CAST OF NINJAGO..._

"Why do I fix everything I touch!? Oh, I am so hooped."

"It's make-your-mommas proud time!"

"I love my momma!"

"I don't get it."

_CRUSH-IT COLE._

"Just take it one game at a time."


	2. Nice Share

AUTHOR'S NOTE

Two updates in a week? I'm on a roll! I know none of you want to read a long AN, you just want the story! So I'll make this quick. Massive 'thank you's to ninja girl777, Guest, and firecrackerxx for your lovely reviews. Guest, I like your ideas but the characters are all planned out and will be revealed through out the course of the story. If you re-examine the prologue, you'll figure 'em out :D. Go on! Read, review, and ratify! (Wait, that's not how it goes...)

oOoOoOo

INSERT COIN

INSERT COIN

INSERT CO- Clink!

"Okay, so where do I start? Um, My name's Cole, Crush it Cole. And, I'm a Bad Guy. Let's see, I'm nine feet tall, weigh about six hundred forty-three pounds. I've got a bit of a temper, I guess. My emotions bubble pretty near to the surface.

"What else? I'm a crusher, as you probably could tell. I crush things professionally. I'm really good at it too. Best I know. If you want something smashed, bashed, or destroyed, I'm your man.

"The problem is, 'fixing' is the name of the game. Literally, figuratively, and metaphorically, all that. I mean, my game is actually called 'Fix it Jay Junior'. So obviously the guy named Fix it Jay Junior is the big hero and stuff.

"He's pretty nice as good guys go, I guess. Fixes stuff really well, definitely does his job. But when you inherit a magic hammer from your father, how hard can it be, really? I guarantee you that if he had a regular hammer, like the standard issue ones you get at a supply store, he would not be able to fix the kind of damage I do that quickly.

"My game goes kinda like this:

"I start out going to sleep inside the stump I call home. Bulldozers come and, uh, bulldoze the forest around me. My 'home' is pushed to the city dump and a big ol' apartment building is built in its place. A bunch of Nicelanders move in there immediately.

"I wake up then and say "Hey! You moved my stump!" So I run over to the building and yell my catchphrase "I'm gonna crush it!" Then I can start breaking windows, pouring down bricks, and basically destroying stuff.

"The key point is when I reach in one of the windows, pull out Gene (he's the mayor of the Nicelanders), and send him flying through the air. That's when the Nicelanders, who were apparently too scared/unconcerned about the building before then to talk, get to shout "Fix it, Jay!"

"Jay comes striding up in all his blue suited and hatted glory, happily tossing his hammer up and down. He starts off by cheering "I can fix it!" One of the lamest catchphrases ever if you ask me, which nobody ever does.

"Once Junior says his stupid catchphrase, he begins platforming up and down and around on the sides of the building. He's the playable character, so he moves wherever the player takes him. Sucker. He keeps repairing windows and stuff until Nicelander Mary opens a window and hands him a pie.

"The pies apparently have magical powers or something, because as soon as he eats it his hat flashes colors and becomes indestructible. Mister Fix-it can then fix windows like ten times faster and fixes them all before making it to the roof. Apparently that's what he was trying to do all along, because that takes control out of the player's hands and sends us into pre-planned scenes that make up the end of the game while big flashing letters say "You fixed it!".

"Whenever Bluejay does a good job and wins (which is almost always), he gets a kiss on the cheek, more pie, and (here's the bombshell) a medal to wrap up the game.

"When I do a good job of crushing stuff, the Nicelanders pick me up, toss me off the building, and I go tumbling through the air to crash into a puddle of mud many, many stories below. Because, are there medals for the sweet science of crushing stuff! To that, all I can say is ha! And no, there are not.

"It's not like I'm complaining. Well, it's a little like I'm complaining. But I get it. I been doing this long enough to know a steady arcade gig's nothing to sneeze at, especially at a great place like Wu's Family Fun Center.

"Seen a lotta games come and go. I mean, think about all those guys from Asteroids. Boom! Gone. Centipede? Pft, who knows where that guy is. Nah, I know I'm very lucky."

"It's just, after so many years, it becomes kind of hard to love your job when no one seems to like you for doing it. You know?"

"And hey, maybe I wouldn't be feeling this way if things were different after work. But as it is, Felix and the Nicelanders go hang out in their homes -which he's just fixed- and run away when I pass by."

"So I head off to the pile of building parts and garbage in the dump, where I live. You might call it a lonely cesspit of despair on the outskirts of humanity... Which would be pretty accurate. But I call it home."

"I guess I can't complain too much. After all, I got my bricks. I got my stump. It looks uncomfortable but it's actually fine. I'm all good."

"But, if I'm really honest with myself, I watch Jay up there through the windows of his apartment. He's always hanging up his medals, talking with the Nicelanders, getting pies and great food, acting like Captain Fancy. And sometimes I think..." Cole sighed.

"Man. It must be nice being the good guy."

Applause.


	3. BadAnon and the Trains

Cole glanced up from studying his large hands to look around at the other 'villians' filling the room with applause. The BadAnon banner (One Game at a Time) fluttered slightly from the wind.

Across the circle of folding chairs, Clyde (one of the ghosts from Pac Ninja, Cole remembered him) spoke up sincerely. "Nice share, Cole. As fellow bad guys, we've all felt what you're feeling. And, we've come to terms with it."

Cole raised a bushy eyebrow skeptically. "Really!"

A large wrestler raised his hand eagerly. With a thick Russian accent, he said "Right here! I am Zangief, and I am Bad Guy."

"Hi, Zangief," the circle said somewhat cheerfully.

"Hi, Zangief," Cole echoed a second too late.

"I relate to you, Cole," Zangief continued. "When I hit bottom, I was crushing man's skull like sparrow's egg between thighs." He slapped his inner thigh enthusiastically.

Next to him, Bowser stirred his coffee and rolled his eyes. The other characters were a mix of rolling their eyes fondly, groaning, and mimicking his speech. Obviously they had heard this many times before.

"And I am wondering, why do you have to be so bad, Zangief? Why can't you be more like good guy?" Zangief paused and spread his hands, speaking almost reverently. "Then I have moment of clarity: If Zangief is good guy, who will crush man's skull like sparrow egg between thighs?" He slapped his thigh again and Cole nodded uncertainly.

"And I say, Zangief, you are Bad Guy. But-" Zangief waggled a finger in the air, "this does not mean you are bad guy."

Understanding claps and cheers.

Except from Cole. "Right, okay, yeah... You lost me there."

The decaying zombie on Cole's right stuck out his hands and grunted "Arrrh. Zombie. Bad Guy."

"Hi, Zombie," BadAnon chorused.

Once again, Cole echoed a "Hi, Zombie" a second too late.

"Zangief saying, labels not make you happy. Good... Bad..." Zombie groaned. "You must love you."

Cyborg (from Cyborg's Justice or something, Cole thought) grinned maniacally from his spot next to Zombie. "Yeah! In HERE!" He made a lunge for Zombie, presumably to rip out his heart and show it to the group, but Cole pushed him back.

"I think I know what you were going to do, and I get it, but that's really gross," Cole complained. Cyborg pouted.

"A question for you, Cole," Clyde said calmly, as if no one in the group had attempted to dismembered each other in the last ten seconds. "We've been asking you to BadAnon for years now, and tonight, you finally show up. Why is that?"

Cole shrugged uncomfortably. "I don't know. I guess I just felt like coming."

Clyde waited patiently, seeing that there was more to it.

"I suppose it has something to do with the fact that, well," Cole shrugged again, "today is the 30th Anniversary of my game."

The devil next to Cole leaned over and congrafulated him solemnly. "Happy Anniversary, Cole."

"Thanks, Satan," Cole mumbled.

'Satan' winced. "It's Say-teen, actually."

"Got it. But here's the thing..." Cole sighed, fiddling with his fingers before blurting it out. "I don't want to be the bad guy anymore."

Horrified gasps as the other programmed villians tried to process that. Bowser did a spit take with his coffee, so balls of fire came spewing out. Clyde turned blue and went into his panic routine.

"You can't mess with the program, Cole," Cyborg warned.

Twirling a finger next to his head to indicate 'crazy', M. Bison asked "You're not going Garmadon, are you?"

"Garmadon?" Cole scoffed in shock. "No! I'm not going Garmadon. Is it Garmadon to want a friend, or a medal, or even just a piece of pie?"

He was standing now, angry. "Is it Garmadon to want more out of life?"

"Yeeeeessss," Zombie slurred.

"Cole, Cole, we get it," Clyde soothed. "But we can't change who we are. And the sooner you accept that, the better your life and your game will be."

"Hey, One Game at a Time, Cole," Zangief offered.

"Now, let's close out with the Bad Guy Affirmation," Clyde instructed.

The group of bad guys stood and joined hands, closing their eyes in near-reverence. As one they recited "I am bad, and that's good. I will never be good, and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."

Except for Cole. He stood with his eyes wide open and his mouth shut tight, not saying a thing.

"Okay gang, see you next week," Clyde broke the silence. The circle split up, bad guys trickling out the door and talking enthusiastically. Zangief grabbed a leftover donut. Bowser refilled his coffee before leaving.

'Say-teen' put an supporting hand on Cole's shoulder. "Hang in there, Cole."

"Hey Zombie, don't forget your hatchets," Clyde called. Zombie moaned and waved his hatchets around to show that no, he didn't forget his hatchets.

Cole quietly followed Zombie out of the Pac Ninja ghost pen where Bad Anon was held. But as the other villains exited to the trains, he hesitated. Quickly, he ran back through the tunnels and filched a pair of cherries before heading to the train cars.

Zangief patted the spot next to him encouragingly and Cole perched on the seat. Slowly at first, then quickly, the train chugged down the graffitied track of Pac Ninja's power cord to the arcade's power strip.

The 'villians' hopped out of the cart, ignoring those who ran away from them, and entered Game Central Station. Cole trailed along behind them, pausing still in the outlet to look around.

Characters bustled this way and that, talking excitedly. A voice came from overhead, the Grand Central Announcer. "Ladies and gentlemen, please do not leave personal items unattended. Unattended items will be confiscated. Report any suspicious activity to the Surge Protector. Last call for Tea Tapper Wagon, departing in outlet two. Tea Tapper Wagon, last call. Soul Train to Dance Dance Ninjago now boarding in outlet twelve. All aboard the Soul Train, outlet twelve."

Cole broke out of his happy reverie and stepped out of the outlet, hefting the cherries. A buzzer sounded as the air turned red momentarily and a shimmering blue man with a clipboard and sparking hair appeared before him. Cole groaned. Surge Protector.

Without looking up from his clipboard, Surge Protector said in a bored monotone "Step aside sir, random security check."

Cole snorted in annoyance. "Random, my behind! You always stop me!"

"I'm just a surge protector doing my job, sir," Surge Protector continued blandly. "Name..."

"Lara Croft!" Cole shouted.

"Name..." Surge Protector repeated, not buying and still not looking up.

"Kirby Morrow?" Cole tried.

"Name..."

Cole sighed and mumbled "Crush it Cole."

"And where are you coming from?"

"Uh, Pac Ninja! Duh." Cole pointed up at the flashing sign above him that plainly read 'Pac Ninja'.

Surge Protector made a note of something. "You bring any fruit with you?"

Cole looked down at his cherries and quickly hid them behind his back. Bouncing on his toes, he replied "Nope!"

Surge Protector finally looked up and blinked owlishly at him. Not finding anything at fault, he looked back down at his clipboard. "Okay then. Where are you headed?"

"Fix it Jay Junior," he sighed.

"Anything to declare?"

"I hate you," Cole deadpanned.

"I get that a lot," Surge Protector said flatly. "Proceed."

Cole walked through the console, head and shoulders above the majority of other characters. People moved out of the way as he came near, whispering fearfully. A tiny angel boy grabbed a matching girl and pulled her away, whispering "Bad Guy coming!" A small character burrowed into the ground before Cole could get a good look at it.

Cole sighed and bit into a cherry. As he passed by outlet after outlet, Sonic appeared on the PSA screens in the middle of Game Central Station.

"If you leave your game, stay safe. Stay alert. And whatever you do...don't die," Sonic narrated. "Because if you die outside your own game...you don't regenerate. Ever. Game over."

Cole happily ignored the signs as he rarely left his game. He was ignoring everyone and everything. But then he came upon a group of gameless characters. It was the Q*Bert gang, holding up signs that read, among other things, 'Out of Order. Please help!'

Cole sighed, glancing back over his shoulder. He went down on one knee and gently put down his uneaten cherry. Q*Bert beeped questioningly, nudging the cherry with his nose, and his friends crowded around.

"Here you go, buddies. It's fresh. Straight from Pac Ninja's." Cole's voice wavered slightly and he sighed, knowing that his stomach would soon be protesting this decision. "Hang in there, guys."

Cole left the Q*Bert gang to chatter about their 'good luck' and went through the entrance to Fix it Jay Jr's. A buzzer sounded as the air turned red momentarily and Surge Protector popped up. "Name?"

"Argh!" Cole shouted.


	4. Party Envy

Back in the gorgeous Nicelander apartment penthouse, a massive party was well underway. Disco lights spun crazily over happily chatting characters from almost every game in the arcade. Music pumped as people danced, drank, and ate hors d'oeuvres. Jay greeted guests happily, blushing humbly when they congratulated him for how long the Fix it game had been going.

Outside and far below, Cole arrived in the Fix it Jay Junior trolley. He tried to get out, but he was stuffed so tight he couldn't budge. He sighed and rolled his eyes.

Crack! Boom! Cole startled, staring up to the top of the apartment. Colorful fireworks were bursting above the penthouse in the shape of Jay's face. Another face exploded into existence and between the two a set of words sizzled up. 'WE LOVE YOU JAY!'

Cole frowned in confusion. "Huh?" He reached as far as he could out of the trolley and searched though a garbage can. His hands dug out a pair of empty bottles. Putting them up to his eyes to magnify his sight, Cole aimed his makeshift binoculars to look through a penthouse window.

His eyes widened as he saw the party. There was ice sculptures and dancing, flowers and a giant buffet table. A presentation congratulated Jay and the Nicelanders for thirty years of gameplay.

Cole read it aloud. "Happy thirtieth anniversary? They're having a party without me!"

Through the binoculars he saw Pac Ninja working his way across the buffet table.

"They invited Pac Ninja?! That cherry-chasing, dot-muncher isn't even part of this game!" Cole exploded, tossing away the bottles so they shattered on the ground. He rocked the trolley back and forth furiously, eventually popping out and scrambling unhappily towards the apartment.

Up in the penthouse and unaware of the impending doom-by-Cole, Jay wandered happily though the room.

"Great party, Jay," Roy greeted enthusiastically.

"Why thank you, friend," Jay chirped proudly, tipping his cap.

Deanna rushed over, grabbing his arm. "Jay, you're needed on the dance floor!"

Jay laughed giddily as Deanna pulled him onto the colorfully flashing dance floor. Together, an entire group of Nicelanders followed the fixer in his Fix it Jay Junior dance, complete with arm motions and steps. "Woot! Woot! Fix it Jay Junior! Woot! Woot! Fix it Jay Junior!"

The doorbell rang. Jay stopped dancing and turned to the door. "I'll bet that's Mario. Fashionably late, per the norm."

"I'll get it, Jay," volunteered Gene, eager to make a good impression on the famous character. He danced to the door and open it to see Cole smiling awkwardly, his huge form filling the door frame.

Gene shrieked and slammed the door, pressing up against it as if his miniscule body could block it from opening to let Cole in. "IT'S COLE!"

The party goers gasped and murmured in shock and confusion.

"He'll crush the party," Norwood hissed in terror.

"Hide the stemware!" Deanna panicked, fanning herself.

"Get rid of him, Jay," whispered Roy fearfully.

"Hey, hey, I got it," Jay reassured, holding up his hands to calm them. "I'll go talk to him, if that's what you really want."

Nicelanders and assorted characters across the room nodded as one.

Jay blew out a long breath. "Carry on, everyone." Pulling out his hammer and twirling it absentmindedly, he slipped out into the hallway and shut the door behind him. Cole loomed high over him and the small blue-clad man gulped.

"Cole?" Jay tried. "Can I... Can I help you?"

Cole rolled his shoulders back anxiously. "Uh, hi, Jay. Um, I just wanted to check on you guys. I saw a big explosion, or something, it went over the building and, you know..."

"Ah, those were," Jay cleared his throat and edged back a step, "just fireworks. I taught Lucy and Don how to make 'em. Pretty cool, right?"

"Fireworks, okay. Phew. That's reassuring." Cole coughed nervously, unsure of how to phrase the next bit. "So, is it like somebody's birthday or..."

"Well, it's more of an anniversary," Jay said slowly. "The thirtieth anniversary of our game, actually."

"What? Is that today?" Cole asked, over-exaggerating his fake surprise.

"I know, right! So hard to remember these things, am I correct?" Jay laughed, relieved that large man wasn't angry.

"Yeah, I'm such a dummy with dates!" exclaimed Cole. "Anyway, congratulations."

"Thank you, Cole," Jay approved. "And to you."

An awkward silence ensued. Cole played with his dark overall straps, tugging at the broken one. Jay looked anywhere but at the wrecker, absentmindedly fiddling with his gold hammer again.

Eventually the door to the penthouse opened and a Frogger turtle sticked his head out. "Just a heads up, Jay. They'll be taking out the cake in a few shakes."

"Hey, Glen," Cole greeted.

Glen stared at him for a minute, cool and disapproving. "Cole." He shut the door, fast.

"Cake," Cole said, rolling the word around in his mouth. "I've heard about this cake stuff. Sounds good. Never had it. No one ever seems to throw it out, so it never ends up in the dump, you know?"

"No. What would trash and the dump have to do with you getting to eat cake?" Jay murmured, confused and a bit concerned.

Cole plowed right over him and just kept going, one hand stroking his chin thoughtfully. "Never actually tasted it. I always wanted to try cake."

Jay looked uncertain. "I don't suppose... You'd like to come in and have a slice, would you?"


	5. Resignation

Dear readers,

I know I'm not technically supposed to post AN notes as entire chapters. But I'm doing it anyway. Okay, I've got bad news and good news. Bad news is first.

The bad news is that I'm giving up on my stories. I'm not inspired, I'm busy, etc, etc. You've heard all the excuses. I'm sorry if you're upset, but I've made up my mind.

The good news is StoriesAreMagic or Sam is adopting/taking on both 'Crush it Cole' and 'Bloopers of the Ninja'. The stories aren't over yet!

I don't know if I'll eventually post anything else. I'll have to see.

It was fun, readers.

~Daye


End file.
